Wednesday Confessional

I’m a Dad. I’ve been one for almost 14 years. I can honestly say that there have been some trying times in these few years of fatherhood. Like some Dads out there, there is always some question as to whether or not, we’re actually doing a good job. Make no mistake, I am so thankful that God has given my boys to me and I will forever be grateful. Sometimes, I wonder if I’m doing it right. Sometimes, I wonder if my sons will appreciate that work that I do for them. I wonder what goes on in their minds when they’re with me for our time together and even when we’re not. What can I change to make things better for them? There are so many questions out there that have been asked but haven’t always been answered.

When my Dad was alive, he was quite busy when I was growing up. Being a PK is definitely not as easy as some may think. In fact, that microscope that we PKs are thrust into tends to get more annoying as we get older and start making decisions for ourselves. Now, many years later, my boys are PKs. Something that they never asked for but, alas, they are. I think back on when I was growing up I did spend a lot of time with my Dad. Granted there were times when he was busy at church or even when he was teaching. One thing he never did was neglect me. I got corrected when it was needed (quite often actually), and then there were times when we would go watch a game or even just go to the park to throw the ball. He even tried to teach me how to play tennis! When I left to go to the Army, I was on my own. No more seeing Dad everyday or even eating dinner with him and my Mom. I was a soldier and a man. But I wonder, if he asked the same questions I’m asking now. Did he question if he did a good job as a Dad? I wish that I could have asked him when I had the chance.

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