Wednesday Rant

OK, so I’m a little “in my feelings”, as they say, today. I got some news that was great to hear but hard to swallow. The details are irrelevant. Let’s just call them bitter-sweet. I guess the point is that I missed it and feel a certain way about it. Remember the last post about vulnerability? Here it is. Well, here is one of those Romulan qualities that is surfacing. I know there is nothing I can do at this point but, still, it’s hard to accept. “Man up” time is nigh. I can’t really blame the messenger because I did ask so, there is no blame placing. Sometimes humans can get in the way of themselves. I’m using myself as an example.

Let me pose a question. When you get “in your feelings” how do you deal with it? Do you use logic or do you just engage them without thinking? What would cause you to just engage without trying to reason with said feelings? For me, it depends on the circumstances regarding why I’m feeling the way I do. Right now, I want to engage but, I know that there are circumstances regarding the issue. This is where logic really needs to be my best friend. I need logic to sit me down and say, “dude, why are you feeling this way, there was nothing you could do. Besides, it’s not like the news was bad, right?” Yeah, the duality of the kindred ancestry between Romulans and Vulcans is a beast to contend with. Especially when they reside in the same space…


Vulnerability: I’m asking for a friend

So, what is it about vulnerability that scares some people and attracts others? I’m asking for a friend because I was recently told that they liked my vulnerability but they wished I showed it more. Another friend said that I could try to be more vulnerable. I’m sensing a pattern here. So, am I supposed to show mu vulnerabilities all the time? I certainly hope not. See, the truth is, I know I’m vulnerable. More to the point, my vulnerability is running around town streaking! Not quite sure how I feel about this whole thing but it’s out there all willy nilly. Once again, I am showing my geek side by saying that I want to embrace my “inner Vulcan”. However, my “inner Romulan” likes to rear its ugly head. Vulcans, as you know, are more in tune with logic as opposed to the pesky Romulans who are the exact opposite. Using passion and cunning, Romulans are opportunists. To me, that seems like that would be like wearing your heart on your sleeve. Another quality that I have been known to have (GRRRR).

I like the logical me. Far less complicated and it keeps me out of trouble. Did I mention that it’s very boring me the logical me? Yeah, not much action going on over on the logical side. Safe, yes. Life of the party, never. See, I’m in a dilemma right now that is like a civil war or an internal revolution (thanks Die Cast). My days of walking around emotionless and having a reason for said state are being overshadowed by the side that is going to and will stop at nothing to get what I want. That’s not all bad right? I mean, if what I’m going for is good, then what’s the problem? Well, good can be relative so, I think that may be where the issue lies. Then again, good is good so, again I ask, “WHAT’S THE PROBLEM?!” Calm, peaceful, bliss, no distractions, I can live with that right? No, how about free-falling, jumping off of the high-dive in 12ft of water? You’ll feel alive. Besides, if you’ve never done it before, how can you say it’s a bad idea?

These are just a few of the things that I humorously deal with on a regular basis. I have to find the humor because, well, you have to laugh at yourself sometimes…